


in you, i find peace

by astarisms



Series: natan week 2019 [5]
Category: Satan and Me (Webcomic)
Genre: F/M, Home, Introspection, Prompt Fic, Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-20 09:33:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20225653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astarisms/pseuds/astarisms
Summary: she is his home.





	in you, i find peace

Lucifer has never been comfortable in one place for too long.

There’s an itch under his skin, the discomfort that comes with lingering, the restlessness that tells him it’s time to keep moving. He is immortal, as eternal as the stars, and yet for all the time he has, there’s a disquiet in him that forces him onwards. 

He has never, in all his years and all his wanderings, felt enough attachment to a place to stay more than a handful of years, though usually he’s on the move again within months.

Not in the estates he’d obtained, mostly through nefarious means but sprinkled over every continent nonetheless. Not in any city he’d stayed in, because even if he managed to form an attachment it was superficial at best. Not even Heaven had been a place he felt he could remain, the need to escape the monotony and hypocrisy a persistent ache felt all the way down to his bones. 

Usually the only thing that kept him around for more than a few months was business. Occasionally he would find amusement in the human capacity for crime, in the larger cities especially, but more often than not his source of entertainment quickly turned sour, his disgust with their weak wills overpowering whatever humor he’d found in them. 

Davis, California had been no different. He’d wanted to leave the city the moment he had arrived, but he remained, bound by the contract and a redhead with no sense of self preservation.

He rests his chin in his hand, staring across the room at Natalie, where she stands at her vanity getting ready. She catches his eye in the mirror and grins at him.

It’s not even a question at this point. He knows the answer and pretending not to would just be a waste of time and energy. He knows why Davis no longer feels like a cage, he knows why the itch has faded, he knows why the restlessness has ebbed into a peace he can’t recall ever feeling before. 

Natalie. Of course it’s Natalie. 

It’s always Natalie. 

It’s her unwavering devotion and her unflinching loyalty until the very end. 

But most of all it’s neither of those because in the grand scheme of things he has thousands of followers who offer him the very same.

It’s the way she challenges him constantly, uncowed by his threats and his horns and the fact that Hell literally resides inside of him. It’s the way she sees who he is, underneath the glamour and the attitude and the reputation that precedes him. It’s the way she sacrifices everything for him, with no guarantee of the preservation of her own soul or of whether he’ll stay.

It’s the way she leans against him when she laughs. It’s the way she smiles just for him. It’s the way she brightens when she sees him. 

It’s everything and it’s nothing and this is ridiculous, but then, what about them isn’t? 

She makes him want to stay. No contract, no obligations, nothing to keep him in this city, or even in this state, or even in this country. 

But he stays. And he stays because he knows it’s never been the city that keeps him anchored in one place.

Natalie finishes twisting her hair up and turns to face him. She looks at him curiously, because he’s still staring at her in a way that’s both far away and intensely focused all at once. But then he stands and she smiles again, reaching out to take his hand, and he lets her because no person, place, or thing has ever made him so unsure of his purpose and so indifferent to it at the same time. Nothing has ever provided him with the comfort and the peace he feels with her.

She threads her fingers through his and for the first time, he thinks he knows what coming home feels like.

It’s always Natalie.


End file.
